Writing Group

Today I spent over two hours at my friend Pam's house with our little writing group.  Granted a large part of that was spent talking about non-writing things like the fact that Pam and I are both giddy about the fact that we're probably going to Salt Lake City's Comic Con  and the strangeness of the fact that Die Hard is a Christmas movie...but we also solved  a major writing problem I was having this week. 

It was awesome - I had felt totally stuck earlier in the day and thought "Well, I'll run this by Pam and Jenny and see if they can help."  In about five minutes we had it figured out to the point that I'm once again excited to work on it.

Some people say that writers shouldn't talk about their writing...and I get that.  I wouldn't want to sit down and spin out the entire plot to someone,  I can imagine that might suck some life out of it.  However,  talking about writing, especially with my writing buddies, has never been anything but encouraging and inspiring for me.   And today was no exception.

Funny Realization Moment of the Day

My friend Pam made me a gorgeous inspiration book/book art creation for my birthday, full of an amazing array of quotes and photos about books and writing.  And - because it's my book - a random picture of Superman.  Then this morning I had the thought "Well, Superman can be in there, he is a writer after all."   Yes, Superman's day job is writing for the Daily Planet.  That made me laugh - I'd never entirely put together the fact that maybe that's one reason the man is my favorite superhero - he's also a writer :-)

Grateful

This has been one of those spots in my life where things have just been happier.   Even with having two weird flare ups of not feeling well, it's still been a amazing couple of weeks.   On the serious real-life side of things I have an internship with the Church Archives starting in January.  Still only part-time, but it's really interesting work that's going to pay decently.  That combined with teaching for the U and for SLCC actually makes me feel downright employable.  It's an extremely good feeling.

I've also watched three good movies in the last week.  First, Thor 2 last Saturday, then the epic Doctor Who special screening on Monday, and today Catching Fire.  All three of them were respectably clean and thoroughly entertaining.  It was a great run at the movies.  It also reminds me of how grateful I am to be married to the world's best movie buddy.  Tracy isn't nearly as in to Doctor Who as I am, yet he still went with me and we had a really fantastic time. 

There's also been a bunch of other things, both serious and silly that have gone on in the last few weeks.  I got to babysit my friend Pam's little boy this week for a couple of hours, and in spite of going through the terrible two's he was a total angel for me.  My long standing favorite show  (Castle) and my new favorite show (Arrow) had great episodes that were again respectably clean and also mushy.   I had a great chats on the phone with my Mom and my cousin Jennie.  Thanksgiving dinner turned out really yummy.  I got the "Jayne's Cunning Hat" card while playing the Firefly board game with Chris, Stacia and Tracy.  Tracy's Mom and Aunt came for a visit last weekend.   It's almost December and I went outside without a coat today. I got an amazingly sweet note from my friend Becky.  In fact, it's been so awesome, I feel like I'm forgetting things.

And can I just say again that I'm married to the most amazing-perfect-fit husband on the planet!

Like I said it's been a lovely few weeks.  I definitely have a lot to be grateful for. 

Some Good Stuff

Some good stuff from the last few weeks -

- My cute husband is definitely my hero!  When I went to go to a job interview yesterday I discovered my keys were locked in the car and Tracy rushed home to help me.  He also helped me with a big Young Women activity on Wednesday night (which my Mom also helped me figure out.)

-  I've had a chance to spend some time with both old and new friends lately.  For example, a couple of weeks ago Evevanne came down and we got to hang out for a Saturday, it was so much fun.  She got me the cutest flip-flops I've seen in in a long time - and I really needed flip-flops.  Michaele's in town so I have someone to commiserate with about the ups and downs of history.  Pam is one of the world's best writing buddies. And last month Becky Criddle and I got confused about the date we were having lunch - the great part - even though it wasn't the day we had e-mailed about, we both planned for the same wrong day.  It was funny and awesome!

- I'm reading books and writing again.  This is a good sign, when I'm at my most stressed I stop doing these things, so it's good to be back at it.  Though I've got a long way to go I'm just past the 150 page mark on the current novel I'm working on.

Yes, there are still some challenges going on in my life, and in my head, but it's great to look back and see the good things that happen.

10th Anniversary

Friday was Tracy and I's 10th Anniversary.  We had made some okay plans, but Tracy surprised me both by getting off early and with reservations to a restaurant that just earlier in the week I told my friend Pam I was craving, clearly he knows me well.   We then went to Deseret Book where I used a gift card I got for my birthday (thanks Tricia!) to find a fun book.  Last we went to a park less than ten minutes from our house that turned out to be really beautiful (it was a good week for parks.)  In any case it was a wonderful day and I can't believe we've been married ten years.  Time flies when you're having fun.

Tracy posted a cute picture of us on his blog:
http://potrazeebee.blogspot.com/2013/05/ten-years-of-happiness.html

In an unrelated note we ended up with some discount tickets to Lagoon because of the book I bought at Deseret Book, so if anyone wants them let me know.  

Hobby Mania

I have too many hobbies.

Seriously -  here's a list of things I do, or am learning how to do, or feel like I should be learning how to do (at least the ones I can think of at the moment):

-Writing Fiction (though this should be a profession, but it's a hobby until someone pays me for it)
-Writing Poetry
-Reading Books
-Papercrafts (Cards, scrapbooking, etc.)
-Crafts (anything not falling into the above category, including jewelry making, decoupage, home decor DIY....I'm beginning to think this list would be freakishly long if it weren't for the word "crafts")
-Learning to play the Piano
-Crochet
-Gardening
-Cooking
-Baking
-Camping
-Postcard Collecting
-Watching TV
-Going to the Movies 

This list does not count the things -  like learning to play the guitar -  that I started enough to actually buy books for, but never did anything with.  (Though this is part of why Tracy talked to me after coming home teaching and asked me out on a date so I'm pretty happy about that one) It also doesn't count things - like playing volleyball - that my younger self was good at, but I can no longer really do.

Apparently I like projects and goals and learning new things.  However, I sometimes think that save item #1, my sheer number of hobbies keeps me from being particularly good at any of them.  Yet they also keep me doing things that are happy and productive.  (Even those last two have helped me make friends.)   I sometimes just wish I had a little better focus, and a few more hours in the day.

Graduation

Friday was graduation day for me.  I might not have even done the whole ceremony and party thing if it weren't for the encouragement of my family.  My Mom and John, Dad and Jill, and Tracy's Mom Tricia all came down for the day and came with me to graduation.  I got a little teary eyed at one point during the ceremony, still surprised that the day had finally come and so grateful to be sharing it with my family. 

 

 If you're interested Tracy caught a video of my part of the ceremony and posted it on YouTube:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moND1lfQqJk&feature=youtu.be

The party was also a lot of fun.  The theme of the decorations was of course Red.  When you graduate from the University of Utah and your favorite color is red it seems like the obvious choice.   Tracy brought me the gorgeous flowers below and I did some DIY to create the sparkly red letters.  The adorable little cap and tassel candy pops were my mom's brainstorm and they were really fun.  I really appreciated everyone who took the time to come to the party.  It was an amazing day!

Final Draft - Dedication and Acknowledgements

I should probably warn my Mom and Grandma not to read this without Kleenex handy...

Tonight I put the last touches on my final draft of my PhD dissertation.  Yes, I still have the format review from the Thesis Office to go through, but this is the last draft that will deal with the content of the dissertation.

This was also the draft that allowed me to create the dedication and acknowledgements of the dissertation. 

I may have talked about this before, but my grandfather, Roy Logan, passed away shortly before I moved to Utah to attend graduate school.  Even though he himself didn't get a college education he was one of the most valiant and consistent supporters of my educational goals.  The same week I found out I had been accepted at the U was the same week we found out his cancer was terminal.  From that moment on I decided that if I actually managed to get a PhD my dissertation would be dedicated to him.   Today my dissertation dedication page reads, "To my grandfather, Roy Wallace Logan."

The acknowledgements also give me a chance to thank some important people, though these are mostly sources of funding and professors, I thought a couple of lines were worth posting here.

"I owe a great deal of gratitude to many people...for their help with this dissertation...my fellow graduate students, especially my friend Michaele Smith...Finally, I would like to express my heartfelt thanks to my friends and family for their patience and encouragement, especially my husband Tracy Cope who provided critical feedback and support and without whom this dissertation would not have been possible."

There wasn't room to list all of you by name, but chances are good that if you read this blog you are in fact amongst those friends and family I am so grateful to have.

As my mom mentioned just today, there really is starting to be a light at the end of the tunnel, and all of you at one time or another have helped me see it.

Thank you.

High Speed Warp and Awesome People

Yeah, that title is redundant, but it's an accurate reflection of the last two weeks.  I've been finishing a dissertation chapter, prepping to teach a class of 165 students, getting used to a radically different and time-intensive church calling and trying to remind myself to breath.

Thanks to several of these things (which are all blessings by the way) and a few extra not-so-fun things I woke up really out of sorts today and a bit taken aback that I would need to face 165 undergrads who didn't really want to be in my class and somehow make history interesting for them (while simultaneously scaring off the perma-slackers) -  honestly I wasn't sure I could do it.

Just as I was starting to freak out a little I got a short but sweet text from my Mom, who is being particularly heroic herself these days, and I remembered some supportive things my Grandma said to me last night on the phone.  They made me think, "Yeah, I can do this."

Then for the last hour I've been fielding finicky start-of-the-semester e-mails and was once again overwhelmed.  Hoping for a virtual breath of fresh air, I got on a friend's blog only to discover that she said some really nice things about me. 

Plus I had super-positive texts from Tracy and another friend which kept the day going as well. 

They always say Heavenly Father doesn't give you more than you can handle, and that's true, but only because I think He also gives you people to help you handle it.

Answering Questions about the Church

I absolutely love this article from the Church about how to answer questions about the gospel.

http://www.lds.org/church/news/answering-questions-about-our-faith?lang=eng

 I especially love the advice to have a two-way conversation instead of lecturing and of tailoring your response to what people want, i.e. don't give them an hour lesson when they just want to know what "stake center" means.   I always tense up at the idea of "missionary work" (because I don't think I'm very good at it)  but I love the idea of focusing on having conversations about the things that are important with people that you care about, because that's how you build good relationships anyway.  Usually I find that if you're respectful and don't try to "pressure or coerce" as the article puts it, conversations about faith-related matters can be a great experience. 

Also, as a person who was once a less active member, I can say that the people who helped me feel ready to return to church activity were those people who actually took the time to know and care about me regardless of whether or not I attended church.  

The Adventurers Return

Ten Great Things About Our Vacation
1. Road trips always remind me that I married the right guy. (He's that cute one at the end of the beach there)
2. Whidbey Island really is as beautiful and charming as we hoped it would be.  Deception Pass Park (it's North Beach is the picture above) is especially lovely
3. Surprises.   For example, when our second campground was less than exciting we pulled out our brochures and learned about Double Bluff Beach, which turned out to be amazing and lead to...
4.  The single best haul of sea shells in terms of variety ever,  if you want to collect shells, Double Bluff is the place to go.
5. That I got to spend time with my awesome family at my Grandma's 80th birthday party.
6. That I got to visit my friend Becky K., see her great kids, and visit with her for a nice long chunk of hours.
7. Camp fires.  Really, just staring at the flames and talking is the best part of camping.
8. The trees.  Holy cow does that island have amazing trees.
9.  Langley, WA.  It's like the Gilmore Girl's Stars Hollow only in the Pacific Northwest.  Yeah, I pretty much want to live there someday :-)
10. My mom, who, even when she wasn't home, managed to make me smile after a long road trip by leaving me cookies.

Three Things I Learned on Vacation
1.  I like camping and I like long road trips.  I don't necessarily love them in combination.
2. When a campground map shows that your campsite is close to the beach, that means nothing.  Our South Whidbey State Park site looked about 500 ft from the beach, and it was, if you dropped a rock off the edge and it went straight down.  The actually walking distance, however, was about a half a mile hike down the side of the hill.
3. The type of wood you use really does determine how easy it is to start and maintain a fire.  The stuff we bought from the State Park stores was a bit of a challenge, the stuff from their hardware store worked awesome.

Five Things I Love About Home
1. The floor is not made of dirt.
2. Going to the bathroom does not require planning, nor a hike up the hill.
3. PRIVACY
4. Knowing where things are.
5. Coming home to this (see photo below) in the garden.

Midnight in Austenland

So Shannon Hale's new book Midnight in Austenland was released on Tuesday.  I swore I was going to be good and frugal and get it from the library....

Then my writing buddy Pam invited me to go to the book launch party and signing today, and with encouragement from Tracy that I should in fact buy the book and take advantage of the opportunity I went.  It was extremely fun, Shannon Hale was gracious and funny, and it was so nice to go with a good friend. 

So I'm feeling extremely spoiled, that for the second time I've been able to chat, if even for a few moments, with one of my favorite authors and have two personalized books on my bookshelf.  It also made me grateful for my sweet husband and good friends. 

Oh, and the book is awesome! I've laughed out loud several times. 

Sending My Novel Into the World

Two years and two months.  How long it took me to finish my novel Capstone and send it out into the wide and brutal world of the submissions process.   After laborious proofreading and multiple versions, and plenty of help from Tracy, my writing buddy Pam and my cousin Jennie, I finally sent out my query, synopsis and a chunk of the manuscript out to an agent I had a referral to.

I've long suspected Capstone might be a better commercial prospect than Rell, I guess now we'll find out.  Yikes!

Oh, and just because I can may I also say:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE WORLD'S BEST HUSBAND!

Confederate Cosmetics

A few years ago my friend Michaele, who is getting her PhD at William and Mary (I am not jealous, I swear), sent me a wonderfully silly souvenir package from Thomas Jefferson's Monticello, including, believe it or not, Monticello Hand Sanitizer.  It was such a ridiculously non-historic souvenir that it became a bit famous, in fact one of my coworkers from the Archives protested that she wanted her own ludicrous historical souvenir, and so when I was in Virginia last summer Michaele helped me locate yet another goodie,  a Jefferson Memorial nail file.

However, recently I received another souvenir from Michaele that I think, once again, takes top honors in the bizarre historic souvenir gift contest -The Authentic Civil War Era Lip Salve (it actually says this on the tube)  Johnny Reb Natural Beeswax Lip Balm in "Mint Julep."  I am not kidding.  It even has a little picture of a soldier in a gray uniform standing in front of the Confederate flag.

Michaele and I have talked in the past about the problem of the glorification of the Confederacy throughout historical monuments in the south, and now I have my own little piece of odd Confederate memorabilia.  And yes, I am using it.  While working on a dissertation about Civil Rights no less.  The world is a very strange place.

Highs and Lows

I'm finally feeling a little better today, and I got to go out to lunch today with one of my friends, which was fun and gave me a lot of energy, so that's good.  I also had a great experience watching General Conference this weekend.  Here's one of my favorite quotes:

Elder Paul V. Johnson: "Getting on top of the cliffs isn't easy...just before reaching the top the climber encounters the steepest part of the trail and views of the canyon are hidden by the cliffs themselves. The final exertion is worth the effort, because once on top the views are breathtaking.  The only way to see the views is to make the climb.  A pattern in the scripture and in life shows that many times the darkest most dangerous tests immediately precede remarkable events and tremendous growth."

This quote comes in handy because I just received an very polite, but very short rejection letter from the agent who asked for pages last week.  Clearly, in my writing career I have some additional climbing to do.

The Way We Look At Ourselves

Awhile ago I read that a lot of grad students have what they call "impostor syndrome" the idea that somehow you aren't smart enough or talented enough to be in graduate school and that any moment your faculty and fellow students are going to discover this and (a) ridicule you, (b) kick you out.

I am definitely prone to this myself, I tend to think I'm too old, or too young, or too fat, or not cool enough, or simply not smart enough to be really be on the same level as my fellow students, and especially fellow faculty members.  I have grown out of this somewhat over my years in graduate school, thanks to several terrific friends and some very kind and dedicated professors, but it's still there lurking around the edges.

Today I was talking with a fellow grad student who I think is awesome, the kind of woman who manages her religious, family and academic life with a skill I envy.  At one point in our conversation we were talking about our GPA's and I told her about my fairly abysmal undergrad GPA. She said something along the lines of, "I'm relieved to hear that, because I think of you as one of the star students."   It was immensely flattering, especially coming from her, but it made me realize that I certainly don't see myself that way.   In fact, I told her that one of the reasons I was so relieved to get my fellowship next year was that it proved to me "I could play with the big kids."

And it is delightful to get that kind of outside validation, but it makes me wonder why I can't manage to see myself that way.  Granted I think I view myself as moderately bright and competent, but a "star"? Not so much.   Why is that?  Why can't I manage to see the best parts of who I am?  It's frustrating, and definitely something I need to work on, since I don't think you have the courage to really go after your weaknesses unless you believe you have strengths.  

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!

I was thinking this morning about things that I am thankful for.  The big, important things never change.  I'm thankful for my husband, my family, my friends, the basic necessities of life (especially a warm cozy house) and for the knowledge that I am my Heavenly Father's daughter and He loves me.

This morning, however, I tried to think about other blessings I needed to count - and became really thankful for books and for reading.  This will come as no surprise to anyone.  However, I realized that 90% of my life is tied up in my love of reading and writing.  

- My job pays me to read.  This week I was reading about Chief Pocatello, strangely enough. 

- My schoolwork is almost entirely reading and writing (especially now that I'm at the dissertation stage).  

- For fun I read novels, write novels, and journal in scrapbooks.  

- My communication with family and friends, thanks to e-mail and blogs, involves a great deal of reading and writing.

- To feed my spiritual needs I read the scriptures every day. 

In fact I can't think of a part of my life that isn't profoundly impacted by the ability to read and write.  Today I stopped to realize that I am very blessed to live in this day and age.  For most of the history of the world, ordinary people, especially women, didn't have the resources they needed to learn how to read and write even at a basic level. Not only that but, thanks to the miracle of libraries, I can read books for free.  (Well, for $4.50 in library fines :)  I can't imagine a world without words.   So my special bit of gratitude for today is to be thankful for books and the fact that I can read them.

Crafty

I think I love Fall.  As long as I don't think of it as winter's prologue, Fall and I get along spectacularly.  When I was shopping for Tracy's birthday presents I saw some beautiful fall wreaths, which, even at 50% off were over my budget.   Dollar store to the rescue!  Eight dollars, four glue gun burns, and some existing supplies later I had this little guy. 

My other new, and entirely adorable, fall decoration was a gift from my friend Becky C.  Having never done glass etching myself, I found it mystifyingly impressive that she could do this. 

Weekend in Williamsburg

So it's been a rough couple of days these last two days, a weird power outage coupled with a bout of major upset stomach and other assorted annoyances.  However, this blog is going to focus on the great weekend I had going to visit my friend Michaele in Williamsbug.

I have to admit that after taking Trax in Utah, I've come to associate train rides with warehouse doors and graffiti and while there was plenty of that on my four hour tour (I have now seen way too much of the least scenic bits of Richmond, Virginia), most of the train ride is actually quite pretty. There were lots of cute small towns, rivers, creeks, swamps, tons of trees and at least one Civil War related National Park.  My favorite part was views like this.

 Michaele did a great job of planning a fun weekend that kept us out of the mind numbing heat and humidity (104 degrees plus humidity is just freaking ridiculous).  Here's the Governors Palace at Colonial Disneyland...uh sorry...Colonial Williamsburg. 

We also went to several of the other buildings at Colonial Williamsburg.  The next day she drove me out to Yorktown, where I got the following requisite Yorktown Victory Monument shot.  What was more fun was walking along the river. What a beautiful place.

Finally we went to the museum that talks about the settlement of Jamestown.  I admit it's one of the better museum I've seen that incorporates all of the different kinds of peoples and cultures that would have existed there.  One of my favorite exhibits was one about the archaeological artifacts from Werowocomoco, which was Powhatan's main village and the center of power for a huge group of tribes that lived in that region.  (Powhatan was the father of Pocahontas).  Anyway, it was a lovely museum and air conditioned!

Michaele also picked out some awesome restaurants, and we had some seriously great food.  I had the best fish sandwich I've ever eaten in my life!  It was great. 

I think the best part about the weekend was that it successfully distracted me from how much I'm missing home these days.   I think the best part about the trip was just getting to be with a good friend for a few days.

Writer's Block

I don't know what my problem is lately, but I have not been in a blogging mood. I'm not depressed or anything and it isn't as if my life has been that boring. In fact last weekend I was able to go to a friend's wedding reception in Pocatello and hang out with some amazingly cool people that I hadn't seen for a couple of years.

Actually my blog isn't the only thing to have suffered, I haven't written a word of new fiction since before my surgery. Which kind of scares me. Hopefully I'll be out of my rut soon.